Silencing those Negative Voice in Your Head

No matter if you are brand new in the business or a seasoned advisor, male or female many still struggle with silencing those negative voices in our heads. With the nature of what we do and all the changes we are experiencing in our industry, it’s a given that we will, at times, struggle with self-doubt to self-confidence. This is particularly true early on in a financial services career. Many find themselves frozen and unable to believe that they will ever master their new profession. However even for more seasoned advisors, they are forced to learn new methods, products and service models all the time. The not so fun news is that change, and learning doesn’t stop but certainly how you face these new challenges matters. I’d like to offer up some simple suggestions for silencing those negative voices and increasing business success.

1. Get out there! Many times, it is simply a matter of just doing it. Peter Zarlenga says, “action conquers fear!” Stepping forward even in small steps is better than doing nothing. Without question, there’s benefit in diving in and growing as you go.

2. Find a motivator. What motivates you? For me it was and still is quotes. I have them engrained in my brain and strategically placed in my space to motivate me. For some music inspires them. For others is it finding a mentor or learning more about an inspirational person. Regardless of what the motivator is, immerse yourself in it. At times when you are down, the motivator will be very helpful to pull you through!

3. Look for leadership opportunities. My involvement in NAIFA and other volunteer community organizations helped me grow my confidence and build leadership skills. These newly found skills served me quite well personally and professionally and they often provided me with new prospects to serve… a win/win. You receive with you give of your time and talents.

4. Check your negative voice. Try to find a friend or family member that you trust completely to share the negative noise with. You will be shocked with how often the negative voice is completely off base and someone pointing that out to you is just what you need to hear. Sometimes just the act of vocalizing your thoughts makes you realize how wrong that negative voice is. So why do we listen to it? Make it a point to share your internal dialogue before you choose to believe it.

5. Use your strengths. Determine as quickly as you can what your strengths are so that you can play to them. Finding success by using your strengths will by default build your confidence. Why would we set ourselves up for failure by trying to do everything? The sooner you can hire to your weaknesses or team up with someone that fills those gaps the better.

6. Sometimes it’s an inside job! There will simply be times that you will just need to get inside your own head and start to believe that you are capable of finding success beyond your imagination. No one else can make you successful. You will need to dig deep at times and find a whole new gear to shift into all on your own. It we are so quick to listen to our negative voice, why are we just as quick to listen to our positive one?

It is an exciting time to be in financial services! As I always say, fasten your seat belt and let’s do this thing! There are incredible opportunities to find an extremely rewarding profession. I wish you great success!!!


A 23-year veteran of the financial services industry, Juli McNeely, LUTCF, CFP, CLU, is president of McNeely Financial Services in Spencer, Wisconsin. She is past president of the National Association of Insurance and Financial Advisors (NAIFA), having served as the 130-year-old institution’s first female president. She is also a member of MDRT and author of “No Necktie Needed: A Women’s Guide to Success in Financial Services.” You can reach her at [email protected].